Damburger

To tie the knot or not to get married tie the knot? That is the question. It never was the doubt. It used to be ‘When to marry?’ not ‘why to marry’. For a long time women were required and put pressure on themselves to catch a mate young, have the ceremony and set up home with tiddlers and a pet, and dedicatethe rest of their days to organising a good household. Perhaps because women have been liberated from what were once their established functions, that wedlock is no longer of importance and certainly not the only path to take. In Actually numerous people- both men and female absolutely detest the idea of marriage, and can’t envisage gazing into a partner’s eyes and promising without question to spend the remaider of their days with them until the end. In many ways it’s very sad, because weddings can be such special events- especially when they feature a pretty wedding dress and sky lanterns. But, ill-starred marriages can be crushing, financially and emotionally catastrophic, and the most isolating things of all. Though being in a ill-fated relationship is also hugely isolating, somehow with the marriage label, it’s even worse. The outside world have certain expectations of a twosome when they are officially married and have evidently spent so much dosh on their wedding day. They are required to be happy or to at least try their damndest to be so. As a result of this perceived external insistence, many couples feel they have to put on a face and obscure their true feelings. The reason why there were once more marriages or why marriages survived a few generations ago is because couples had no choice but to keep pushing on with their relationship. This is advantageous in some respects, but in others, it is very corrosive. Yes there were more such matrimonies, but there were also many more desperately wretched ones.